Santana - Maria Maria ft. The Product G&B

This Heavy Load...

...has me feeling so very sad

Where to begin I just don't know...

I do know that I am so very tired...

So very tired...

Life has hit one too many punches upon me...

The zest that I once had for life seems to have all, but vanished...

I tried so hard to smile for this picture, but I just could not, even trying, I could not...

The emotion spoke louder than ability to try...

Concussions, surgery, recovery from surgery, epilepsy, lost of strength, the never ending road of seeing doctors...has taken its toll

I feel that I do not even look the same as I did, just a few two short years ago...

My sons are thousands of miles away...thousands...

My heartbreak is immeasurable, but I am always told to "stay strong"

If I had many people around me, to love and support me...I possibly could stay stronger...

It is rather difficult to do this "strong thing" alone...

Especially, if you have had to do it, time, and time again...

Crying tears upon your pillow alone, walking down the streets alone, recalling all those memories alone, is a bit rough upon the soul...

Sometimes, I feel as if I have no fight left within me...none at all

Like tonight...

This is why I write...to all of you

I will not fool myself that this will be an easy comeback, and the tears that I cry for my sons are tears that are of the deepest love, and they will not go away...

But I reminded myself tonight, that I can pull through this, and become that strong Maria once again...

I remember when I broke my foot due to a cycling accident, and by the way, the last cycling accident, for I had had one too many, and the doctor took my bicycle driving licence away from me...(;

Each day with my little foot in a cast I would get up and I would walk one block for about a week...

The next I would walk two blocks...

The next I would walk three blocks...

Until I could walk as many blocks as I could...

That is a great story for me to remember...

So each morning, I shall wake...

I will walk around the block...

The next week it will be two blocks...

The next week it will be three blocks...

Until I will be able to walk as many blocks as I can, and this, is what will build my physical strength...

Physical strength builds heart strength...

Heart strength builds soul strength...   

"And soon I'll be walkin' out the dooooor...

"By putting one foot in front of the other..."

Simple, but fantastic words to live by...

So, if you don't mind everyone, I will dedicate this post to myself, for I have fought many a battle, and I keep coming out strong. I know that there will be more to come, but with simple words and simple faith...we can all make it out the door...:)

Great things can be achieved by just the very first step...

I send my love to everyone, and if you too, are experiencing a heavy load, I do hope that my simple words bring you some comfort and love.

My love to all of you

Maria Juarez Beam (Boheme)

Musical Selection: "Maria Maria"

By Carlos Santana feat. The Product G & B

https://youtu.be/nPLV7lGbmT4

ENJOY!!!!!

Remember please, never to take anything in your life for granted. Life is change. What you once had is now gone. What you now have could go away. So love all those around you and if it is you, love you, every ounce. Love life, people and not material pleasures or pleasure that lasts only a moment. Life is to precious...

Maná - En el muelle de San Blás (video)

Great Love and Great Sadness...

A True Story...


Many a wind has passed through the timeless village of San Blas, many a day of beauty, of trade, and many of great sadness over hundreds of years...this story, or at least the beginning of,  just over a short fifty years ago.

A most beautiful young woman, Rebeca Méndez jímenez, as she was serving savory, local fish to foreign arrivers of trade, met the dark eyes of Manuel; a flame of love was born in this pier of low lying rain forest in San Blas, Nayarit, Mexico.

Brief was the treasured time that this love affair could bloom. Yet, intensely and passionately it not only bloomed,  it blossomed. Manuel gave a promise of marriage and of return to the sweet Rebeca. His ship was to sail the next day to come.

Twenty-four hours Rebeca and Manuel savored one another until the very moment of his departure. Manuel waved his last goodbye from his ship, only to leave the lovely Rebeca with memories and her tears...

Rebeca, at that moment swore within her shattered heart, that she would have no other and that she would wait for Manual to fulfill his promise to her. As each lonely day came and left as the waves, Rebeca walked the beautiful comfort the blue waters of the Pacific Ocean would give to her; she, with her faithful spirit, longed painfully as she would wait for her betrothed's ship to return to the pier of San Blas.

Many longful day passed,  the hurting soul that was now Rebeca, began to walk the pier wearing her white, pure as the purest snow, wedding gown, and carrying a sweet, small bouquet of flowers ...everyday. As people do, the love to talk of another's tragedy occurs. The villagers of sleepy San Blas named Rebeca, "La loca de la muelle," "the crazy woman of the pier.

Rebeca and her daily ritual of her walking, now passed into years. Her skin was no longer the same, yet her tears, her deep pain, and her intense sadness had not altered. She remained faithful to her love Manuel, who so sadly never returned to her ever loving arms.

On one particular, very solemn day, the evermore beautiful Rebeca, in faded wedding gown, walked into the ocean that she so profoundly loved, perhaps more than her Manuel, she walked until the sea took her with it forever with caring, gentle, and loving waves. Rebeca, Manuel, and the sea were joined by eternity...Maria Juarez Beam, a true, timeless story from the timeless San Blas.

I have had the great privilege of going to San Blas over 20 years ago. It is ever so lovely and so charming. It has a captivation quality that has remained within in my heart these past 20 years. I do hope to return this January.

I am writing this tonight for all of Mexico, but for especially this incredibly special place of San Blas for it was to bit hit seriously by hurricane Patricia. Miraculously, at landfall the hurricane did not do the damage it was anticipated to have done. I am so very happy. (:

The song I have chosen for this piece is 

"En el Muelle de San Blas" by Mana

It song form it tells the story of mainly Rebecca. It is one of my favorite songs.

https://youtu.be/teprNzF6J1I

With my love always,

Maria Juarez Beam (Boheme)

Be loved and loved well...