A Heart in the Desert

A heart can live in a desert

With miles of sand and rock

To which into your heart are insert

The desert is a beautiful and amazing place.

Full of life and stars a plenty in the night. 

Yet, if alone there are no people within your space.

The heart can feel so cold and away from inside yourself.

Snow falls upon the heart that is wandering the desert alone. 

The tears turn into snowflakes searching for the shelf.


The shelf of a life it once knew...and cannot forget.

It is a heavy heart pushing through life daily.

This heart desires so to be re-lit.











By the fires of life, of love, of beauty.

By beauty and love...

Sometimes, oft times the heart needs time to heal, to mend.

Losses, so many losses to endure and one day the heart shall soar as a dove.

When that shall be I am not certain.

I sit with this heart and do what I can to mend whilst it is in the desert.

Waiting for it to comeback to its place and I can finally pull back the curtain.

Maria Juarez Beam

Musical Selection: "Como te Extrano Corazon" by Mana

http://youtu.be/lnFn-nCk6rE

This poem and song is dedicated to Brian Ross Bradley, my husband 1959-2003

My mother, Guadalupe Landeros Hidalgo Beam, 1929-2007

My father, Robert Terrance Beam, 1930-2009

My son Preston

My son Alexander

I love and miss all of you, hearts of mine...

Glorious Rain Part 3...

...I was unable to finish my ending words...oh, how I adore this I-Pad...Not really...;)

So to end I send my love to all and I wish you a most lovely morning...day...evening! And if you have rain, dance, dance, dance...:)

If you care to I suggest for a song, Standin' in the Rain' by Electric Light Orchestra.

As always, Maria Juarez Beam (Boheme) 

Be well all until we meet again...             

...Glorious Rain Cont...

...Well, once again, I must beg forgiveness for my I-Pad. I wish I could post pictures that I take and songs as I did before, yet alas, I am unable or I just do not know how...so to continue...

There is something so very magical here in Mexico when it rains...life carries on. people are still out and about...the rain does not deter. I was so gifted to watch the children, to see so much love expressed by their parents, and to just be with the rain. I also met some lovely people. One lady, who was selling her small paintings, was so great to converse with. Artists have a way of connecting. She spent much time in Chiapas, Mexico, home of the Zapatistas and of Subcomandante Marcos. we spoke of them and she has met Marcos...WOW! I was so enthralled with what she shared. I wanted, one day to meet him myself, yet she shared that it is very difficult to do so...at least I have met two people in my life who have met and spoken with him. If you are unaware of this, at least in my opinion, of these amazing people, The Zapatistas of Chiapas, please do google to learn more. :)

So life is glorious in the rain...soak it up and indulge. Be one with the elements as the people here in Mexico and what a gift you will be given...

I thank you with all of my heart for reading and for beei

Glorious Rain in Guanajuato, Mexico...

RAIN
RAIN
RAIN

There is something so very special and so very magical when one is fortunate enough to watch children in exhilaration in the pouring rain. Oh, what joy watching them with their pink and blue umbrellas running back and forth from within in the rain and to the love of their parents.

I went out this evening for a stroll and I decided to spend some time in my favorite plaza here in Guanajuato, Plaza San Fernando. It is very bohemian and very relaxing. There are several restaurants with never a lack for music. It is the raining season right now here and it rains, rains, rains. It certainly is truly needed and a glorious gift.

I was sitting on some steps and then the rain hit so I, and, all out in the center of the plaza went for some cover. Yet everyone is so joyful about the rain. Life carries on...the music plays, people are outdoors under the umbrellas in restaurants, and people are even strolling in the rain with smiles on their faces. And, of course, the splendor of the children dancing and playing in the rain.

This 

Love Can Change The World cont... :)

...Oh, this I-Pad of mine, it has a mind of it's own! As I was writing, yes with each act I am going to change the world...will you help change it with me, please? I know that there are many good and kind people in this world who do wonderful things everyday...yet, I truly feel we can become more aware of transitioning our beloved world so that all can live in great peace and harmony. I feel we simply just need to ensure that we do this with great intent. It is time for the world is in great chaos and many are living desparately while others are living a very comfortable life. I see it here so vividly on the streets of Guanajuato daily and it tears my heart into many shattered pieces and I think...what can I do?

Tonight I held a woman of many age within my arms tonight. Daily she is in front of one of the churches with her plastic cup awaiting for people of good hearts to drops some coins into here vessel of hope. Tonight, rather than just dropping the money, something within me moved me to ask her how she was...I looked straight into her dark eyes and immediately she began to weep and wail intensely within my arms. I cried with her I could feel the pain contined within her heart. I stroked her hair and I softly spoke to her...'let your tears flow.'
I held her for a very long time. Somone passed by and said in Spanish...:she is drunk let her be to herself. I coud not do this. I could smell the alcohol on her breath but it did not matter to me. Who am I to judge her? All I know, is that I could feel immense pain within her. And this to me, is so relevant.

So this I ask of all of you my beloved readers is reach out, reah out to make change without judjement and with your full heart and soul. For this I thank you so very much...toghther you and I we can usher in a world beyond beautiful...:) My love to each and everyone of you...Maria. Olease forgive any errors in spelling and editing, but I can sincerely express tp you that tis I-Pad is it:s own world and will not allow me to edit or doing what I whis as I could before with my laptop. Time to save for a nw laptop indd...peace and love...

LOVE CAN CHANGE THE WORLD!

Yes, LOVE CAN CHANGE THE WORLD...of this I am certain. I can feel it beating in the very deapths of my heart...can you, or do you doubt? Is it only a dream or a fantasy? Within my spirit I say our world can change for the betterment of all.   And would this not be wonderful, amazing, just incredibly fantastic!? 

  If each and everyone of us did something everyday whether it be large or small with our full conscious and with the intent that with this act I can help change our beautiful world. yes am going 

....Feeling Lost and alone, yet healing...

Hello my most beloved and faithful readers. Please forgive the long delay in writing, but I have been doing much healing and I am in Mexico at this moment to heal myself and I am...yet at the same time I am feeling very lost and alone. I wish at this moment I could explain all of this to you in words. The words are in  my heart and are not quite ready to fly out. Sometimes we need to feel lost and alone in order to reach the light...and the light I am grasping for with all of my might. It is a mighty lonely feeling when you feel as if many have abandoned you and you are attempting to seek a better life for yourself. Even when you are trembling inside as a leaf in a storm, you still must remain strong. Shed your tears you must, yet after the shedding it is time to stand tall...taller than ever. Oh, how I have learned so many lessons in the most difficult of ways in order to find MY way in this life after so many have left either in death or in order to move on in their lives. I miss everyone and as I have shared before, I miss my life former my former life with my husband and my sons, yet as the Dalai Lama expresses, 'the one thing you can count on is change' To this I can certainly attest. I have learned many lessons...and the most important lesson that I have learned while here in Mexico is that I must first begin with me...

My love heart and soul to all of you until we meet again...Maria

along with the light comes healing...

my most beloved readers of beamthelightbethecgange i beg your forgiveness for such a delay in writing. tonight's post shall be short, but i did want to reach out to you and send out my love...

healing takes so very long and i have come a long way with more to go. this body is mending and healing and this is the reason for my prolonged silence. yet, my voice desires to speak out tonight even if for simply a moment.

body, heart, soul, and spirit are so interconnected and one cannot heal fully without healing all of these vital componants of our very existence.

please bare with me as i heal. i shall hold your hand while you are holding mine...heal with me and together we shall not only heal ourselves, but our beautiful world as well...

i am sending all of my love, maria

maria juarez beam (boheme)


musical selection ; prince royce ''stand by me''

A Heart that is Healing Yet Feels Lost...

...And what does one do with a healing heart yet a heart that is also feeling torn and tattered as this rose above. The rose, at least in my eyes, still retains great beauty, yet it is bruised and torn in places. A heart can be so fragile and for this so many put up walls around the heart...as a fortress. Yet, love is so amazingly beautiful, it is one of our greatest gifts bestowed upon us. Why do so many pass it by or have a set way of thinking of how love ought to be or how it ought to become into fruition... 

I have healed in so many ways yet now new wounds have been inflicted upon this heart and I must learn a new way to heal, salve, and give my heart the love it needs when I am wanting the comfort of another human being. I am wandering this planet in a world of my own and in a shock of returning to Western ways. 

I took a chance and opened my heart to love once again...only to have to leave it behind. My heart is beating inside of my body, feeling intense sorrow, yet it is also somewhere else. It is in another country and in the chest cavity of another man who now has moved on with his heart for the pain of  my leaving shut his heart down...

Now is the time for me to truly love me, care for me, and of course, I shall give my love to others...and once again hope for that day to reenter my life...my heart...my entire being... 

I am a woman in love with love for a man and for all of humanity...All my love to each and everyone of you all....

Trying to Make the Flowers Grow...

I have a few moments before I leave for an appointment and I have been longing to write yet...life circumstances often can get in the way. So before I depart, I wanted to write at least a few words to share with all of you my most wonderful and beloved readers. 

I have learned since returning from Mexico, how quickly life changes. What once was alters or disappears altogether...so what I am attempting to do is make some new flowers grow. Old flowers shed their immense beauty, fade, and then disappear...and then comes the time within its cycle for the new blooms to appear. What glorious beauty this is, yet in the meantime, the bulb, the seed, the roots are replenishing and renourishing so that a beautiful flower in all its splendor can be born anew...

My love to all of you...nourish and renew, Maria

Maria Juarez Beam (Boheme)

When the Heart & Soul Become Set Free...

WOW! I am struck...I now know why my mother wanted me to go Guanajuato, Mexico, the land of my grandparents and my ancestors; to save me from my heartbreak and from my bleeding soul. Yes, the soul does bleed and when it does, I truly believe it can take you to your grave. My mother, my Guanajuato, my Mexico and all of it's splendor saved my life. 

I may not be able to finish this writing tonight for I am low on battery power, but I knew I needed to allow this river  of words within me...begin to flow. A body can fall apart and if you have read much of my writing, you well know that I have had my share of this. Yet, what I now know, is that my intense heartache, which led to a soul soaked and dripping in blood is what truly needed to bathed in the healing waters of salvation. 

One of the most impactful stories that my mother told me was the story of Mario Lanza, a famous opera tenor and an actor in the 1940's & 50's. I remember intensely her asking me if I felt that anyone could die from a broken heart. I needed to pensively allow this question to enter my mind, my heart, and my soul. As a young girl, I certainly had experienced heart break...I answered her with a "yes, mom, I do believe so. She then explained the intense love Mario had for his wife, she died and then he died from his immense pain within his heart...this was so very powerful for me to hear and has never left me. I often wonder as to why my mother felt the need to share  this with me at such a young age. A mother, a good mother, can sense what type of  child she has and she will do all she can  to guide her path...even after their death.

Mama, I love you so much. I miss you, but you are within me as a guiding and a protecting light full of love for your daughter. I thank you my mama...

I do have more to write, but need to stop now and hopefully within the next few days I will find my charger.

All my light and love to you my most beloved readers, Maria

Maria Juarez Beam

Boheme