So this picture befits...
Yet, I mainly chose this picture due to the intent look within my eyes...almost as if they have tears...
I feel it quite apropos for this post...
Forgive me if I have used it in the past...for some reason it speaks to me tonight...
As many of you know, who visit me regularly, I am recovering from a serious fracture of the tibia...
I am healing and recovering, yet it has been a long road...
I have not been sleeping well at night...
This could be due to the leg, but at 5:30 am Pacific Standard Time after being up since 2:00 am PST...I came to a conclusion...
I want to be held and to be touched again...
I could feel it within the very core of my inner depths...the yearning strings of a harp wanting to be played...
A few tears flowed as I was lying there sleepless in bed...
Also, wondering, what does it take to get someone to hold you, to touch you, and to love you once again...
It has been eight long years now since my husband passed...
Yes, I have had "boyfriends," even several marriage proposals, yet at the time, it was just not right...
Now, I feel that I have mourned him as he deserves...
I am pining, longing for deep compassionate love...
For someone to hold me each night...to touch my face, and my long hair...
There is nothing more majical then the power of touch...
I could melt and sleep as a babe in a man's arms once again...
I feel I am finally ready...
Yet, who out there is ready for me...?
Well, here goes Maria again baring her deepest soul, her wide open heart. I thank each of you with all of my heart for reading my words, for my writing them to you, helps me to understand myself better each day, and to become better. I am given the opportunity to truly understand what it is that I truly need. With all the depths of my heart...I thank you. May love be with all of you and may each of you have someone to hold each night. It is a precious gift...
All my love to all, Maria
Maria Juarez Beam
“So she thoroughly taught him that one cannot take pleasure without giving pleasure, and that every gesture, every caress, every touch, every glance, every last bit of the body has its secret, which brings happiness to the person who knows how to wake it. She taught him that after a celebration of love the lovers should not part without admiring each other, without being conquered or having conquered, so that neither is bleak or glutted or has the bad feeling of being used or misused.”
― Hermann Hesse, Siddhartha Quote courtesy of http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/touch
"Your body needs to be held and to hold, to be touched and to touch. None of these needs is to be despised, denied, or repressed. But you have to keep searching for your body's deeper need, the need for genuine love. Every time you are able to go beyond the body's superficial desires for love, you are bringing your body home and moving toward integration and unity."
Musical Selection: Mana "Lluvia al Corazon"
Rain of the Heart...
Music in any language speaks to us all...please do enjoy...:)
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